Friday, January 11, 2013

Learning to tell your point of view

Have you ever had a person who told you over and over that you were --too short---too fat---too skinny---not pretty enough---or something that really hurt your feelings.

I just had one of my friends leave after telling me how she felt about some comments.

WOW!!!

Hurt was pouring from her--as it should have.

But she didn't really tell that person what she felt like.

Because she didn't want to hurt their feelings!!

This is what I learned while I ws in college.

I feel---I felt---I have found. 

This works every time!!

I tell you the truth.!

I feel like a marshmallow in a nutcracker.

I have felt this for a long time.

I have found that I need to change what I am doing for work. So I have to give my resignation.

Wouldn't this get across to the boss what you were going through than tell him what a scum bag he is for asking you out on a date??

I feel like nothing when I hear those words.

I have felt that way for a long time.

I have found that those words are not acceptable to me any longer.

To your boyfriend, sister, mother, father, husband.

Much more effective than making them aggressive with your words.

It's all in how you say it. The feel-felt-found approach is telling them the facts not the feelings.

Neat and to the point.

Works every time.

Try it on your spouse, child, childs teacher, a bully, anyone who has hurt you or made you mad.

It would lead to a lot less bullying, spousal abuse, child abuse and any other abuse.

Life can be so easy---when we just figure out the best way to do things.

More laer, Linda